Nation Novel Writing Month

NaNoWriMo is once again upon us.

 Rejoice with me, as thousands of bad novels are beginned.

This guy is:

And so is this guy:

This is my 3rd year participating in NaNoWriMo.  I did some pretty hard-core winning last year, and plan on winning twice as hard times four this year.

<-------- Proof that I winned at NaNoWrimo last year (I was the only one).

I'm gonna win harder than this guy.  Totes.

But not as hard as this guy.  He wins pretty hard.

And this year I plan to write my worst NaNoWriMo novel yet!!

How many sci-fi/fantasy tropes can you smash into one poorly written novel?

A lot.

There will be:

• Time Travel 
• The Moon 
• Giant Spiders 
• Robots with laser-beam eyes
• Giant Robot Spiders with laser-beam eyes
• Human-cyborg relations
• Zazz
• Wizards 
• Ninjas 
• Generic Radioactive Isotopes 
• Romance 
• Secret Volcano Lairs
• Evil Geniuses who break Evil Genius Rules
• Poorly named villains whose names are thinly veiled descriptions of their powers
• AND MANY MORE!

So keep checking the NaNoWriMo section of this blog for all the exciting news about the best novel ever written about pansexual wizards who team up with a Ninja to save a giant spider from a moon-dwelling tentacle monster.

(Sssshhhh... this guy is rejoicing too... just look at those sensual lips and tell me you don't want to see him win.)

Ready Player One

Ready Player One
By Ernest Cline

Rather than doing a review for Ready Player One, I decided to just go ahead and write the movie trailer for it.

Click here to purchase Ready Player One

Movie Trailer Time after the break:

Not a review of The Wise Man's Fear

The Wise Man's Fear (Kingkiller Chronicles, Day 2) 

by Patrick Rothfuss

“In many ways, unwise love is the truest love.” Pg. 53

“It was like watching stories being born.”  Pg. 379

“For without hope what do any of us have?”  Pg. 450

“There are so many men, all endlessly attempting to sweep me off my feet.  And there is one of you... Making sure my feet are firm beneath me, lest I fall.”  Pg. 471

“They say a thing in one breath and others will find meaning in it for a year.”  Pg. 713

“Anything that brings two people close together is intimate.”  Pg. 817

“All you have to offer the world is your anger.”  Pg. 839

A few years ago a friend of mine handed me The Name of the Wind with the one word of instruction, “Read.”  It was a thick black paperback book that stretched upwards of 1,000 pages; how could I NOT read it?  How had I not read it already?  What the hell?

“Give me that sonovabitch” I said.  “What’s it about?”

Not a black Devil Crab Thingy

“It’s about a ginger who owns a bar, tells stories, and fights black devil crab thingys.”

Being as we were both employees of a chain book store who strove for nothing higher than to be cool, edgy, and hyper-literate devourers of verbiage who dance on the razor blade edge of fiction I had to consume it and pretend to like it lest I look a fool.  I was, after all, a massive fan of A Song of Ice and Fireseries, and as such would not be intimidated by the first effort of some unknown author.  

Of course, as a fan of George R. R. Martin’s epic series I have seen first hand the perils that go along with getting on board with a series of 1,000+ page fantasy novels.  The release schedule for such books tends to be frustratingly slow.  And as I read 30 - 50 books per year my ability to recall who killed what where and with, wait, is she getting her wolf back or not tends to get a bit muddled.

I’m awesome so I read The Name of the Wind with a quickness.

When you finish a 1,000+ page book you’re reaction should NOT be:

“I wish that was longer.”

And yet this was my reaction.  I also force fed it to several of my friends and bought the excellent audio version from Audible.  

The Wise Man’s Fear is the sequel to Mr. Rothfuss’s first novel.  And it is great.

I bought two copies.

So if you haven’t read The Name of the Wind then you should just buy both books and read them and enjoy them and we will talk about them in 3 months when you’ve finished reading them.  It will be fun.  You will be happy and hug me.  I like hugs.

If you’ve already read Wind, but haven’t read The Wise Man’s Fear then I will justify the investment of Wise Man in a few simple words: Kvothe unleashes all manner of hell and sexes a bunch of women-folk; a fact competently demonstrated by the fine folks over at Penny Arcade:

I don’t really want to say much else about a book that is a sequel, except that you should do yourself a favor by reading it. Mr. Rothfuss also runs a rather excellent blog that is worth checking on a regular basis.

Here's a random Youtube video starring a pretty girl:

How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe by Charles Yu

How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe

Yu, Charles

I realized a couple of years ago that not only am I not super-skilled anything, I’m not even particularly good at being myself.

-Pg. 10-

Most people I know live their lives moving in a constant forward direction, the whole time looking backward.

-Pg. 22-

You lie in your bed and realize that if you don’t get out of bed and into the world today, it is very likely no one will even notice.

-Pg. 181-

At some point in your life, this statement will be true: Tomorrow you will lose everything forever.

-Pg. 211-

...just like the concept of the ‘present,’ is a fiction.

-Pg. 216-

At its heart How to is a story about a family that uses the trope of time traveling to express how segregated we as humans are from the other humans; even - no - especially from our closest family members.  It comes complete with infinite causality loops, paradoxes, alternate universes, and all the other clichés you’d expect. 

Time travel stories have, I feel, become kind of annoying.  Star Trek has beat Time Travel to death, and popular movies like Back to the Future and Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure have been pretty hard to beat. 

Party on, Wayne.  Wait that's not right.

And yet, I read How to in two sittings.  It’s a fun riff on the scenario and it’s an easy, fast read.

The thing most people will probably get a kick out of from this book is Yu’s breaking of the fourth wall that makes this a very meta-fiction.  It is also a book that seems heavily influenced by Douglas Adams’ The Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

The main character’s father, one of the discoverers of time travel, gets lost in time, and the second half of the book deals with Yu’s obsessive quest to discover where/when his father is/was/will be.  The scenes with Yu’s mother/not-mother were particularly touching and played on the ubiquitous regrets that we all harbor over the things that we could have done better in our lives.  We could have been better children/parents/friends/siblings/spouses and to that end we will go through greater lengths to hide the pain we carry and delude ourselves with lies than we ever would to just try and be the people we want to be moving forward.  Much of the material dealing with Yu’s mother directly addresses the idea that the past is not ever truly gone as long as we remember... if for no other reason than the past continues to exist, literally, as bio-chemical processes within our own physical bodies.  Shame then, I say, that there is no known way for our species to foster a sort of selective genetic memory so that we are able to pass on to our descendants important information such as:

1. The proper way to handle that not-so-fresh feeling
2. How to cure a hangover
3. What “masturbate” means
4. Why did Daddy leave?

Just imagine all the awkward questions that could avoided through the selective transmission of genetic memory.  Let’s order the scientist to get to work on this immediately.

Oh, I just realized I got off topic.  How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe is a good book.  Go buy it and read it.

Io9 Q and A with Charles Yu

@charles_yu

  

Dying of the Light by George R. R. Martin

Dying of the Light

George R. R. Martin

"Can they love without a word for it...?" Pg. 37

George R. R. Martin is a fucking beast. His attention to detail and his ability to meld natural organic worlds with advanced Sci-Fi Tech is unparalleled. His characters feel real, and the decisions that they make don't feel like they were made just to move the plot around... Everything just kind of flows.

Dying is set the same universe where many of Martin's other SF story are set. It's an amazing universe populated by dozens of sentient species, including offshoots of humans. Anybody who has had the chance to read the compilations of Martin's earlier works called Dreamsongs will be on familiar ground with Dying, but if you haven't you might find the book to be esoteric. However; the character development is strong enough to carry you over some of the rough patches, and some time spent studying the glossary at the end of the book will serve as cliff notes for information served up in other stories.

My only knock on the book is the thread left hanging at the end. Ugh. I understand leaving some threads loose... It only makes sense to do so in a book that is only one story - one part - of a greater whole, but the big question left open at the end of the novel is a shame. I am a huge fan of Martin, and I enjoy the fact that he routinely breaks the "Rules" that college creative writing teachers tell their students. 99% of the time he gets away with it, but Dying's epilogue is weak.

That said; Dying of the Light is a great read marred only slightly by a weak ending.

November is National Novel Writing Month!

Here is the site I've created in dedication to this years project: The Complete Winner's Guide to Writing bad Science Fiction.

Oh, here's a link to the official NaNoWriMo site.

How I became a Famous Novelist

How I became a Famous Novelist

Steve Hely

-          People will believe thousands of different lies in succession rather than confront a single scintilla of truth.  Pg. 45

-          But that was all for the editors to sort out.  Pg. 115

-          As research for my novel, I’d read almost all of the Wikipedia page about tornadoes.  Pg. 162

-          She was clearly worried about getting every detail right.  That’s a stupid and time-consuming way to write.  Pg. 221

-          You’re always looking for the falseness in everything.  Pg. 303

-          The only way to live life is to lose your self.  Pg. 322

This is the second time I've read this book, and I enjoyed it just as much the second time.

I laughed out loud several times.  That's a good thing. 

But, also, I appreciate the fact that the protagonist is a very flawed character who I found myself cheering for.  Not so much that he would get what he wanted, but that he would evolve and rise above the petty adolescent BS that was simultaneously driving him forward and holding him back.

This is a great novel that I highly recommend.

The Game by Neil Strauss

The Game

Neil Strauss

I recently listened to The Game as an audio book downloaded from Audible.com.  I don’t really like audio books, but found this to be one of the better ones I have downloaded.  This is in part because it is narrated by the author.

The Game is offered up as an inside look at the world of the professional Pick Up Artist.  It chock full of advice on how to approach an attractive stranger and start up a conversation.  Because of the way Neil Strauss presents this information when you finish The Game you’ll probably feel like you could go out and get your swerve on; kinda like when you watched The Fast and the Furious and sat in the cinema parking lot revving Hyundai’s engine. 

Not that I did that or anything. 

But soon into The Game you’ll realize that there is more to this book than just how to scam babes into working your cock.  Beneath the veneer of smooth Game running pimpitude this is one of those books where you’re, like, supposed to learn a bigger lesson and stuff.

After Neil gets into the realm of being a Pickup Artist (PUA) he moves into this crazy Fight Club-esque testosterone fueled house.  You can guess how that goes.  As much as we might not like to admit it; masculine and feminine compliment each other… like peanut butter and chocolate.

What I take from this book, as a single guy, is something I’ve always known, but never really been able to put into words.  The things that make for a strong first impression… the attributes that women are initially attracted to… the things that drive them nuts in the bar, the coffee shop, the super market, or the break room in the office are not the same things that keep they hanging around after the initial attraction has faded. 

What attracts a mate is not what keeps a mate. 

It would seem that nothing says, “I’m gonna make your toes curl and your back arch,” like sweater vests, economy cars, and diversified investment portfolios.

Oh wait.  That’s not right is it?

Because of this dichotomy The Game covers some tricky subject matter.  Handled wrong it could come across very misogynistic.  At times certain characters hit that mark without a doubt, but the author doesn’t.  He seems genuine when he claims to not be a douche.  Rather, he was addicted to his new-found self-confidence and skill in making new connections with beautiful women after years of feeling alienated and inadequate.

Ultimately, the lesson The Game teaches is the same one your mom always told you; Be yourself.

But The Game recognizes that sometimes yourself has low self esteem and feels awkward talking to strangers… And if you just had a way of going up to an attractive stranger and starting a conversation that would be cool, because at the end of the day we’re all just peanut butter looking for some chocolate.

Chapter 10. Draft 2.

Chapter 10 arrives with little fanfare.  I'm too tired to link, but it's in the PDF section off to the side there...

I spent most of my writing time today articulating my view of where I am in my life, and where I want/need to be headed. In short; not here.

I'm working on it.

9th Chapter draft #2 Completion percentage 100%

2^nd draft of Chapter 9 is finished and posted onto the interwebs  as proof of my crime against humanity.
The rewrite for Chapter 10 is pretty much done as well because I worked on both chapters simultaneously. So that should probably be up at the end of next week.

Chapters 11 and 12, however; will be posted as *Gasp* first drafts. Why? Because I completely scrapped what I wrote in December, did brand spanking new outlines for them, and will start on the “prose” after I post Chapter 10. This was decision I was hesitant to make, but it was necessary and I think I’ll still make my July 31, 2010 goal for a finished draft.

I haven’t even finished the 2^nd draft and I’m already planning how I’m going to approach the 3^rd draft. So, yeah, I’m pretty excited. Partly because I don’t really like this draft… Not that I think it’s horrible… let’s just say if it was a house it be a fixer-upper… This is a task that I have found I relish.

In other boring Steve blog news; I bought a netbook so that I can now look even more pretentious when I’m sitting at Panera drinking expensive coffee drinks that I don’t even really like (Panera has great great food, but their coffee is meh) and working on my novel that no one will ever read. Score!

Still, I won’t look as douchey as the guys with Macs working on their novels that no one will ever read… Those guys are dicks, and I guarantee their novels are about something stupid like lesbian cowboys who eat pudding, wear fanny packs, and talk about their feelings! OMG who would wanna read that crap anyway?

But seriously, the battery life on this netbook is amazing… Something like 11 hours of word processing! Bonus: I wrote this blog on my porch with my pooch at my feet and some mellow tunes serving as the backdrop to the drifting cloud of lightning bugs perforating the night.

                              I could sit here all night…

Alright, some sugary sweet YouTube goodness and I’m out…

Freedom (TM)

Freedom (TM) by Daniel Suarez

“Freedom is overrated.  You can be completely free and starving in an igloo in Antarctica.  Business is what makes people’s lives better, not democracy.  The world is filled with dysfunctional democracies, paralyzed by idiots with votes.”
Pg. 147

Freedom (TM) continues the epic story began in The Daemon.  The Daemon saw control of the world sliding out of the hands of big business and corrupt political powers, and into the control of Mathew Sobol’s artificial construct know as the Daemon. 

Freedom (TM) picks up where The Daemon left off, and gives the reader a more personal Main Street USA view of what the Daemon’s takeover means to regular folk.  With skyrocketing gasoline prices  and high unemployment dominating the planet those who choose to side with the Deamon find themselves part of a collective enacting real quantifiable social change.  These new Utopian communities find a balance between technological sophistication and practical sustainable living for the benefit of the community; not some highfalutin Wall Street dandy.
But all is not well.  In the wake of the collapsed financial system government backed currencies have become worthless.  


The Corporate, government, and military powers are kinda dicks about being cut out of the fiscal loop.  Queue the body count.

Just as in The Daemon there is all kinds of crazy high tech, ultra violent action in this book that would make Hideo Kojima say, “Damn, I should have thought of that.”  The violence is awesome, but it’s importance is underscored by the social and cultural message that is the book’s foundation.  Watch for some douchenozzle game company like EA or Ubisoft to pick up these books and ruin them in an interactive form by focusing solely on the hyper violence and next gen weaponry without giving the social commentary it’s due. 

In one of Louis L’Amour’s finest books The Walking Drum there is a quote, “... a book is less important for what it says than for what it makes you think.”  Suarez’s two novels will make you think.  As I read Freedom I couldn’t help but think that there is a better way.  True Democracy could work with the assistance of technology in world with an educated populace, and technological sophistication and material wealth do not have to come at the expense of our environment or our population.  Even a few quick reads on some websites show that technology and capitalism-lite (great taste and less filling) could actually benefit from self-sustainable micro-cultures (my term) if handled by forward thinking humans who weren’t driven by material wealth or hindered by the standards laid out by our ancestors.











This is the rare work of fiction that entertains, prophesies, and informs.  Get it in your hands ASAP.



“It is pretty amazing how the brain just kind of plays along.  We’re quite willing to delude ourselves.”
Pg. 197

“I curse your data....”
Pg. 204

“It’s not about how many people you can kill - it’s about who runs out of people first...”
Pg. 218

“I’ve been amused by the debate in America over whether torture is effective...
“Of course it’s effective...
“But not at producing information.  Torture isn’t about about extracting information...
“Torture is about control.  You let me torture a thousand people, and I can keep five million working obediently with their heads down.  The more innocent the victims, the better...”
Pg. 219

“Those plants have as much to do with agriculture as a weight lifter on steroids has to do with physical fitness...
“This is just a big green desert.”
“You think these other farmers will change?”
“They’ll have no choice... Industrial farming and the global supply chain gobble up fossil fuel...  Natural gas in the fertilizers, petroleum-based pesticides, fuel for the tractors, more fuel for transport to food processors, fuel to process the raw crops into food additives, then to manufacture them into products, and then to transport the products across the country...”
Pg. 242 – 243

“You hear how democracies are all over the place, but it isn’t really true.  They call it democracy.  They use the vocabulary, the props, but it’s theater...”
Pg. 264

“Our social psychologists told us the panic should make people eager for strong leadership.”
Pg. 377

Darklost

Darklost

Mick Farren

“Bury your money in the graveyard at midnight, and the curse will be lifted.”

Pg 140

Darklost is the second book in the Renquist Quartet, and it competently continues the bizarre – almost ridiculous – story of a modern day Nosferatu colony.   

The first book, Time of Feasting, was set in New York City, but at the conclusion of the book the colony was forced to flee in the face of an undead (zombie isn’t quite the appropriate term) army.  Darklost finds our lovable heroes in sunny L.A. where they adopt Brandon Wales (think Marlon Brando) as one of their own, fight crooked cops, and… something else…

Oh, that’s right.  They go head to head with the Apogee (think Scientology).  It turns out that when crazy people aren’t scaring black women on television they like to summon immortal harbingers of destruction.  Who Knew? 

Mr. Cruise out of the

closet long enough to 

scare a black woman

Apogee’s head dude, Marcus, is pretty not good at summoning cosmic entities into our universe.  I say “not good,” because he actually CAN summon non-corporeal beings… He just can’t control them once they get here.  And this time he’s hard at work bringing across the most powerful of uber-powerful squid-like beings: Rusty.

Rusty Rocks for Jesus

Ooops.  That’s not right.  It was Cthulhu.  I get the two confused sometimes.

"I can't do a thing with these face tentacles!"

In the end this novel taught me that scaring Oprah is way more fun than trying to summon Cthulhu, but not nearly as likely as you get you laid by Katie Holmes.  

Still, I highly recommend the series to fans of SF/Vampire mythologies.  The series so far has flirted with absurdity, but is so well-executed that it never feels cheesy or campy.

And now; More Rusty

Chapter 7: Draft 02.  Done.

This is a pretty long chapter.  But that's not the only reason it took so long to finish this draft.  Aside from some personal issues in my life over the last few weeks there were significant technical obstacles: Google.

I decided to use the Beta Version of Google Docs.  This seemed like a good idea at first.  The Goog added a Ruler and better support for comments.  Unfortunately they also made it nearly impossible to get your work out of the Beta Docs in any format that's useful.  I'm sure it's just a Beta Bug, and I'm a dumb ass for committing hours of work to a Beta.  But it still set me back a couple of days.  Twice.

In my anger at Google, I attempted to use the Beta of Microsoft Office Live or whatever they call it.  It would be really cool, except that you have to use Internet Explorer (I use Chrome) and the the way it saves is really really slow.

In Television news; new episodes of Party Down on airing on Starz.  Of course if you have Netflixyou can stream them through your internets Box.  Last night's episode with Steve Guttenberg was pure genius.  Watch it.

Chapter 07; You ignorant Slut

I always get Chapter 07 confused with Jane.  My bad.

Anyways, Chapter 7 has been a real pain.  I have decided to break it into two parts for the purpose of this blog posting of the early draft....

Why?  Because I'm still working on it.  It has been a very difficult section, and even though I know these are just early drafts of a crappy work of fiction that only I am probably even reading I want to post something that is at least readable.

The second part should be up this weekend.  But Red Dead Revolver comes out this week so it's hard to tell.  Rockstar Games makes the good stuff...

Chapter 6

I just finished the latest draft of Chapter 6.  There are several areas that are still lacking, but it's a big improvement over the original rough draft.

Each time I finish a chapter I get really excited to start working on the next chapter, but I also get frustrated because I know the chapter I just stopped working on isn't the best that it could be.  It's an uncomfortable thought to know that something unfinished is out there and available as a representation of what I'm working on.  But this is the course I've charted for myself so I'm sticking to it.  

I finished two books this week; so expect some snap reviews and quotations to go up over the next few days as I get time.

The Time of Feasting

The Time of Feasting by Mick Farren

    I didn't expect much from this book when I started reading it. It was recommended to me by this scruffy looking Nerf-herder I work with. 

    As I got further into it became obvious that Farren can actually write. I turned to the back of the book to look at his mini-bio and it turns out he spent some time teaching writing courses at UCLA. 

    Then, as I got further into the book I realized that Farren had some interesting ideas about how to break from the traditional Vampire lore and still being respectful of the genre. There aren't any sparkling day-glo angsty douches in this book. They are vampires. They don't tell you they are bad... They seduce you, violate you, and then throw you away.  It's gory.  It's sexy.  And it's fun.

    The contemporary setting ('80's New York) was cool. The book's acceptance and respect for superhuman paranormal was cool (the vampires are threatened with destruction by a Zombie army if they don't get out of town). 

    I would recommend this book to just about anyone, and I can't wait to read the sequel. It's not the best book... Probably not as good as Fevre Dream by Martin... But it's worthy way to spend a weekend.    

    Nature is nature... Evil comes by choice and by the exercise of will.

    Pg. 146

New Draft of Chapter 5

This is the roughest draft I've posted yet.  Still, it's fairly readable.  There are a few places where I had to skip ahead a bit, because of continuity issues that I haven't worked out yet.

But, that's enough of Chapter 5 for now.  It's time to start working on the next draft of Chapter 6.  This is when the story starts to get kind of weird...


This is a great video of some girl singing the Cake song featured in Chapter 5.  I wanna be her friend.

The Windup Girl

The Windup Girl by Paolo Bacigalupi

First, it's written in Present Tense. Bad, Paolo Bacigalupi, Bad! 

I can't decide if I liked this book or not. That's a bad thing... 

The ending wasn't very satisfying after a meandering plot where I often wasn't sure who the main protagonist was supposed to be, and there wasn't a strong antagonist for any of them to work off of in any sustained/suspenseful way. 

The world-building was excellent; although implausible. The details were vivid, and the excellent sensory descriptions were often what kept me turning the pages when I wasn't particularly interested in the characters or able to see what larger issues were at stake. 

Also, it's written in present tense. 

I will probably read this book again, but I won't recommend it to any of my friends except the most serious of SF readers.

One can think there are such things as loyalty and trust and kindness...In the end they are only smoke and cannot be grasped.

    Pg. 72

Akkarat may be rich, but he is a paper tiger.

    Pg. 83

Everything is change...Clinging to the past, worrying about the future...It's all suffering.

    Pg. 349